


Four seasons

by Nalou



Category: X-Men (Alternate Timeline Movies), X-Men (Movieverse), X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: Canon Disabled Character, Canonical Character Death, Charles-centric, Chess, Erik is a Sweetheart, Genosha, Grief/Mourning, Healing, Hurt Charles, Love, M/M, Past Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Post-Canon, Post-X-Men: Dark Phoenix (Movie), Psychological Trauma, Tea
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-15
Updated: 2020-01-15
Packaged: 2021-02-27 05:00:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 726
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22271464
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nalou/pseuds/Nalou
Summary: Found in Paris, Charles agrees to leave for Genosha, to follow Erik in his haven.But Charles can't find his peace, eaten away by his mourning.Only time, chess, tea and love might heal him.
Relationships: Erik Lehnsherr/Charles Xavier
Comments: 11
Kudos: 37
Collections: Collectif NONAME English Works, Textes du Collectif NONAME





	Four seasons

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Lyra64](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lyra64/gifts).



> This is my participation for the Collectif NoName's Secret Santa and a gift for Lyra Scoresby!  
> Thank you Flightinflame for the brainstorming, Flo'wTralala and Kaelyan for the help!  
> Hope you'll like it ♡

Charles wakes up with a gasp, halfway raised on his elbows already. Finding his breath back is tricky, his throat still clenched from the unvoiced scream.

Erik is here, seated at the foot of his bed, legs awkwardly bent because it’s way closer to the ground that Charles is used to. He has a hand on Charles’ ankle, and the absence of sensation makes it hurt even more - Charles craves to be touched, right now, his heart slamming so fast against his ribcage it looks like it will shatter his bones. But Charles can’t look Erik in the eyes. He can’t -

He sees Erik’s thumb slowly moving in circles against the sheets instead, and tears are welling up against his lashes.

He has dreamt - He has dreamt again, of her. And he can’t hide it, not from his friend, not from - whatever they are, now.

“Charles,” comes Erik’s voice, soft, almost cajoling. “I made you some tea. Do you need anything else?”

_To be left alone_ , is what he wants to say, but doesn’t. His mind is torn between the two options, craving for company and for loneliness at the same time.

_A stiff drink_ , his mind chants, as his trembling fingers curl around the ceramic mug. But there’s not a drop of alcohol on the island of Genosha - and he has looked for it. And oh, what he would do for a glass of any kind of cheap liquor. Instead, he sips at the insipid tea they grow on this small patch of land and conceals a grimace when it hits his taste buds. Charles senses that Erik sees clearly through his little hiding game and regrets not to be able to give him something better.

Charles often wonders why he agreed to come here with Erik. His words in Paris, when he had come to find Charles in this small cafe, in this city milling with thousands and thousands of minds and where his had stood out like a beacon on fire, had felt like a burden removed from Charles’ shoulders. Someone in the whole wide world still accepted to be near Charles after what he had done. Someone for whom Raven had - Raven had been important. Raven is important.

And Charles’ thoughts get derailed again when her name comes up, and he’s thrown back into his dream, and his telepathy expends as far as it can to try and find her mind, somewhere around the planet - but nothing. She’s gone, she’s gone and he refuses to believe it, she’s somewhere, happy and healthy and far from her controlling brother -

“You should come outside,” Erik whispers somewhere close to him, in the harsh reality. “See the colour of the trees changing, the first leaves on the ground, and the air is still warm. It’s truly beautiful-”

“You know I can’t just wheel myself in the mud, Erik,” Charles snaps, anger so quick to rise. But the Erik he has known for more than thirty years now isn’t the same anymore. Instead, he lets the rudeness of Charles’ answer roll past him, just like one of those damn early autumn leaves carried by the wind. Summer is gone, just like her, and he refuses to think about it.

“I can take you anywhere you want, you just have to ask.”

Charles’ first reaction is to push him away, but something in Erik’s weary eyes washes the anger away, like the tide slowly licking the shore. But Charles can’t go outside, can’t acknowledge the change of season, and can’t let Erik carry him around to occupy him when he has so much to do.

He fills his lungs with a deep breath, feeling them expand for the first time after so many short-breathed sobs, closes his eyes for a few seconds.

“No, it’s fine. Go back to work, we’ll play chess tonight, okay?” He knows Erik is reluctant to leave him on his own, but at the same time thinks about everything he’s still supposed to do before the end of the day. He feels Erik give in even before he sighs and gets on his feet.

“Call me if you need something, alright? Anything.”

Charles nods and Erik departs with a last squeeze of Charles’ shoulder.

And no matter how hard Charles tries to concentrate on the game, those days, he can’t win even once.


End file.
